Currently reading the biography of Corrie ten Boom. Never expected it's so good . I didn't expect the biography to have such big impact on me, after all, she's just one survivor of Nazi camp. Thank to the writer who wrote it such that i could see the pictures clearly as well as moved emotionally as the people in the story felt.

And as i was reading it yesterday, came accross the chapter where the Gestapo raided her house in Beje, and brought the whole family to the first camp (forgot the name). Anyway, there's her first experience to meet something she dreaded much. And there's when the idea of Hiding Place came about.

I love it so much. Taken from Psalm 91, the words did really come alive there. And i remember the song, You Are My Hiding Place.

You are my hiding place
You always fill my heart
with songs of deliverance
whenever i'm afraid
i will trust in You
i will trust in You
Let the weak say
I am strong
in the strength of the Lord
I will trust in You
I will trust in You.

Was it Corrie who wrote those words?
After i read that account, the song was more beautiful and meaningful than before.
If you've been through those nights, you'll agree that it's a very beautiful song.

The idea of hiding place (place i simply wanna to hide because the reality just too much).

And the idea that God always fills my heart ... with songs of deliverance (at the time when we're defeated and helpless.....it hurts much that God put songs of deliverance....but that's faith.....God planned for deliverance (though it could mean not physical delivery))

And (the acknowledgement) that indeed ... I'm afraid
But, I will trust in You (my resolution)
And the 2nd words....(an agreement to the first statement) Yes i will trust in You despite i'm feeling deadly afraid.

The last chapter of the song:
Only weak people feel afraid
In the strength of the Lord .....(the only thing i can depend for surely it's not from within me myself) that i will trust in You.
And the last word I will trust in You ... (only if u know the tune and understand some music)....there's a smile there as you sing it(Yes...how good it's to trust in God).

And one more person i'd like to thank. My former student who asked for this book "My Hiding Place" Thank Jez I believe it's such a wonderful and life changing book
Now i wanna to visit Harleem

Nearing my long awaited holiday,
things are coming up...
the work in the office ...
there're new documents to write
new project to do estimation
and new mistake i made ... cost my boss dearly ...aiyoh...i will remember it as one my stupidest ever advice.
Proffesionally it's unacceptable to make that kind of mistake.
Humanly it's completely understandable, my mind wasn't there.
For surely it doesn't take an expert to know the answer.
And i made that obvious mistake....

Inwardly i was uncertain of what's happening.
I found it very hard to make decision.
And easily irritated with other people.
A sign of stress?
Losing of to spend hours in front of Nintendo Wii charms...
Slowly lacking of in my self discipline (took me 1 hour for the PGP route). And waking up later and later every morning...

Just now i stopped at the empty field.
And up there i could still see many stars (though much less than one i used to see when i's a child).
How wonderful it must be for Abraham.
When God showed him the stars in the sky.
And asked him to count.
"Abraham believed God".
There i found comfort to my soul.
Believe ... in His words.
Once again i put my worries into his hands.
And there once again i know peace.

Half year just ended.
Now entering the 2nd half of the year.
Thanks to a friend who reminded me of this.
I'll take this life seriously.

I've never been in more want to be a rich man than now.
How i wish i were a rich man.

Received an SMS last week that
a friend needed a monthly support of $XXXX for him to serve in full-time capacity. If only people could spare 1% or their income, this surely won't be a problem.
And just now read an email from another friend ... needed 50 times that amount ... and if there're 10 people share the load .... 5 times $XXXX is needed. Otherwise their work may be stopped and they've to return back from the work so strategic..

Or if only i have known a rich man ...
or having a rich friend ...
surely i've one
and the one i've tested many years back ...
Lord i turn to Thee again
for the needs of my friends
for the needs of your works
Jehovah Jireh

This song is dedicated for hellomiss,
for her sincere and good encouragement
I appreciated her reply and thot this song a very meaningful

I've not sung this song for some times ...
and tonite the words came so beautifully

My Jesus, I love thee,
I know thou art mine;
for thee all the follies
of sin I resign.
My gracious Redeemer,
my Savior art thou;
if ever I loved thee, my Jesus, 'tis now.

What a wonderful song
all the follies of sin, I resign ...
if ever I loved thee, My Jesus, 'tis now ...
I’ll praise Thee as long as Thou lendest me breath ...
if ever I loved thee, My Jesus, 'tis now ...

I lift up my eyes to the hills.
From where does my help come?

(as far as i lift up my eyes ... from where does my help come?
i can't think of any possible ways or means ...
as far as i lift up my eyes... even to the hills and valleys
i can't see source for help)

My help comes from the LORD,
who made heaven and earth.

(his name is the LORD ...
he is my helper
he's the Creator of the universe ...
his name is the LORD)

He will not let your foot be moved;
he who keeps you will not slumber.

(he will not let my foot be moved ...
i will stand firm
because of him)

Behold, he who keeps Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.

(he doesn't slumber ...
he doesn't sleep ...
my helper is faithful God)

I lift up my eyes to the hills.
From where does my help come?
My help comes from the LORD,
who made heaven and earth.

~Psalm 121~

What a day.
Thank God so much for how things turn out at last.
This morning i opened my email, to read that indeed God had not only answered our prayers. But he supplied with much more abundant goods. So i'm so glad Much more than what i can put into words.

Not only that ... the work issue was resolved too.
What seemingly impossible, somehow my boss could get the source file. And i managed to generate the code, and after i verified, turned out to be correct... so no more reverse engineer and hard work ... it's solved

And all these just a day before i'm going home What a timing. And indeed i managed to get all the stuff was looking. 'All'

Last point, the project is closed well too just now. Boss had training so couldn't attend the important meeting. I told her "don't worry, should be ok". And thank God, it's fine Hehe...heard my boss message: "Good job"
What a day
Thank you Lord.

finally ... going home ...
at least 1 week won't be any update
and yah enjoying the rest ... i'm sure the world still running, even without me

btw, it's been 8 years living in singapore
hopefully there is change after 8 years

It's the famous term in Indonesia to express a complex mixture
Hehe...yah...how's the holiday?
It tastes like Nano nano

Okie...first of all...it's one of the best holidays...hehe
Yah...there're just too many good things to be listed here that i might miss the important points i wanna to write down.
I can say that there's nothing I regretted on this trip (as good as it's)
Maybe a short thanks for few people who made the holiday special:
1. Kitin ... hehe...thank u banyak buat holiday yg menyenangkan ... jalan2 and makan2nya
2. Aseph ... thank u also for the nice dinner and visiting my home, also seek to send me back to sg... Wish the best for ur business and marriage
3. Charles ... thanks for coming to my home too ... hehe make my holiday more complete...and yah...will send u the photos. Semoga lancar2 kerjaan and hubungannya
4. Andrianus ... hehe..i know u won't read this. But wish u increasing influence and power .. haha...grace be with u my friend
5. My family...thank u for everything u've done The dinner, time, and providing all i needed
6. Friends who prayed for me and wished me a good & safe trip ... your prayers are answered
7. Last but not least ... my ever best and good Lord ... for making all things beautiful in its time .... still i trust u for the future

Life wasn't end there ...
For just 1 day after ... serious thing attacked me ... that yah quite took me abt 1 day to resolve that ...
And last nite received another more difficult and yah ...
And i could see this is only the beginning ... the road to victory is still far away ...
I could cry and thought what a bad fate happening to me ....
Help me i pray ... Jesu Juva

Oh ya...will write few things abt the holiday at next email ... somethings worth sharing and wishing

Yup ... it's abt the holiday aftermath
As a whole ... it's really a good one.
I was able to meet with people I would like to meet.
And really thank God for the goodness they showed me ... despite their busy schedule ... somehow at the end things work well.

And yah...i'm very glad for the eye opener lesson from this.
I'm very sure now how weak i am ... hehe
Super bad in communication and listening ...
And yah ... i'm glad that it's something i'm aware of now
and it's better to realize now than later

Many other occassions to that yah proved the point to show how weak i'm in those areas.
Last nite thing also added to me the feeling how weak i am.
Simply i don't know what to do ... and then realized there're many other things which i really don't know what i should do

Somehow i'm glad that i'm not Superman...
I'm just suparman .. hehe
I do not have the robe to fly
But i've a mother, brother, and sister under my 'wings' and i will protect them
I am not able to solve many things
But i'll struggle to put things right ...and yah be more courageous
I do not have Lois or is it Lana?
But haha......... :p

Bottomline, i'm glad for who i am ... with the weaknesses i have that now i can see more clearly. And yah ... will work on it and looking forward for next year

Project Jonathan Edwards: 30% ~ completion by July 2008
Project Listening : 5% ~ completion 50% by July 2008

Still thinking about my short holiday trip.
And yah can't stop thanking God for a wonderful holiday i had.
1. Thank God that ci Ester on holiday as well ... the same week when i was there. And it's just too marvelous. Hehehe.... Normally it's so hard to meet her, but now i could come anytime.
I visited her on Monday...and yah the whole afternoon witnessed how she played with 2.5 years old Ezra....wahahaha....what a mother And yah....there i learnt abt motherhood & love ... how precious is a child and how noble is motherhood. One may wonder what good it is to spend hours just to entertain a child (and sometimes he laugh at the stupid things you do)....compares to the amount of 'good' and 'great' works one may do. But i saw there the expression of love and the value of a person (even a baby).
I pray you would give talk on motherhood to many womans and that many will be benefited
I can see the fruit of her labor ... little Ezra only 2.5 years old, not going to school yet till probably 5 years old. But he could understand alphabet, words, songs, and better still ... he is kind & polite to new people, he's generous, and knows how to pray.. I hope one day he'd be a great pastor One scene i would always remember...how ci Ester sang the song and he marched around the table stomping his feet like littler soldier....
That fun, purity, and freedom...laughing to your hearts content.

2. Thank God for short visit to retired Pastor Titus. Somehow just talked abt it with mum and asked her to visit Pastor Titus' house. Since mum still friend with the wife so we made it (out of the busy schedule). I really thank God and if there's one thing i would regret in this trip...if i've not visited him. I'll always remember when i's a child, frequently ill, and always asked him to come and pray for me... Yah...never forget those days ... a pastor would come and pray for me...and not a doctor. So yah...20 years later probably...i visited him and he'd forgotten all those years. But thank God for the oppurtunity to visit him...we prayed together....what a privilege if i could pray for the one who prayed for me...and still there he prayed for me again

3. And then visit to my ex Sunday School teacher....she's still teaching Sunday School. Hehe...thanks Laoshi Mei Ling. Thank you for the sharing of children ministry. Thank you for showing me how marvelous and wonderful works done through this things which seem trivial and small things. I'll remember the passion and a life dedicated in service

4. Meet another ex Sunday School teacher ... and he's getting married this August.) God bless you and wish you a wonderful marriage. And yah...i'm glad that you did it before me Thank God for this wonderful teacher.

That's all abt the visits within short holiday...
A usual prayer time with Andrianus ...
A usual discussion abt church ministry and future with Ci Ester
i miss meeting with pak Kango and hope next one will meet it

And finally kak Steven expecting birth of baby boy this August )
Haha....thank God for the happy news. May he too will be great pastor (for Kak Steven already gave him for this service).

Met Kelly over a lunch. And later got to know about his job and what's he's doing. My first mistake was Kelly can be guy name. One question from him that still remember clearly: "What's the most effective way to destroy wall?". To be honest i didn't know. I've not destroyed wall before, and perhaps using big drill as i saw they drilled our wall to fix the leaking pipe....

Kelly answered: "you destroy the lower part first, then it's very easy to tear down the whole wall. Because the weight pull it down."
I will always remember that.

Wanna to write this quite some times after our meeting. My mind went to event 2000 years ago. When 3 men were hung on the cross. The cruelty and severity of such punishment. When the weight of the body pulled the men down, the rusty nails inflicted so much pain on the hands ...also.. resting awhile on their feet........they pulled their bodies up again...and breathed as much as they could...that motion repeated....gasping for breath and intense pain as the rough edges nails touch the veins/arteris (i'm not sure which one passed through the wrist).

Then when left only 2 of them on the cross, the soldiers broke their legs to fasten their deaths. Surely...without their legs...those men would die mercilessly as they couldn't catch breath. The panic that attacked them helpless but concious as sure death at hands...

Kelly's answer" ... destroy the lower part ... and so easy to tear the top part ..."
There i remember the cross
Where my Jesus was hung
If ever i love thee
my Jesus tis now

Tonite decided to go for short run after few days the weather didn't allow me. The route led me to pass through one of the forgotten tourist object in Singapore: Haw Par villa. There seems not many people know or mention it as interesting place to visit. There's only one time i went up bit to see what they have there. Hmm... the atmosphere was rather 'quary' if that's the right word to describe. In short i don't like what i saw over there

A thot came to my mind as i passed through that place again. As it's dark and quiet....what if i accompanying people who thot otherwise? People who have different value and taste than me? To them perhaps it's such wonderful place, where they could see many "chinese" cultures & heritage. And yah...i might say how i'm impressed with the chinese's tradition and their imagination to come up with so many interesting stories. How they try to preserve the cultures and traiditions in such way that those statutes were made to resemble the actual things/persons. Then pointed out how they too had such fear for what's named as dragon. For it's such big and scary animal...and surely incites fear to whoever see it.
But ... how lucky that as a Christian, i'm not afraid of those dragons. For the Lamb has defeated the dragon. And not only that...the people of the Lamb too, overcame the dragon by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimonies (Rev 12:11).

Thank God for the many blessings
Of course so much more when one blessing shower stays with u
Hahahaha....happy bday piyo and continue to be a blessing for those around u :D

Sat nite spent playing board games with my DG gang ... we played 'Bang' till 10.30...i the first to die...hehe what a fool to be so honest

Sun nite spent watching musical with another gang and tepen haaha...glad for the wonderful event and the 'talk of the town'
And yah...the bday celebration ... and prazt short sharing ...buhuhuhuhu....

Well... a new brother is coming and may i be a blessing for him also hehe (hope blessing is contagious)

Reading few friends blogs this morning and feel so glad to see their updates