Finally the day came.
The day that I had to say goodbye,
to all my colleagues & teammates.

It was a memorable day.
Penpen helped me much with the sandwich.
And piyo & jtg helped me too

It was a beautiful day.
With everyone enjoyed the sandwiches
And the team made it for my parting morning.

It has been a very good and blessed 3.5 years.
Where I met so many different people.
At the end, I could leave in peace.
Knowing that I've given my best there.
I've left goodness in those people's life.
And invested friendship that will last through lifetime.

I'm so blessed to meet those people there.
From different nationalities & backgrounds.
As far as South Africa, West Europe, and even Russia.

Only regret that I couldn't keep all the photos.
For I left in rush and didn't manage to save all those memories.
The group photos, the cute emails, and insteresting movies.

Certainly I missed the people and the place very much.
Suddenly all was gone.
And it felt like yesterday.

Parting is never been easy.
The longer time beingg spent together.
The deeper the relationship.
The closer the friendship.
The greater the loss is.

Now looking back.
I wish all the best for them.
May grace be with them.
And hope to see them again one day.

I've completed that race.
And ended one journey there.
So one chapter closed.
And another chapter just began.

Thank you Lord for seeing me through those 3.58 years.
For the times of laughter and tears.
For the lessons You taught me.
For the fears and joys.
For moments of loss and moments of triumphs.
For all that had taken place.
May everything serves for your Glory & good pleasures.
For your sake,

Amen.

The song below best describe my feeling at the moment.
Feeling very heavy & uncertain.

I Know Who Holds Tomorrow

I don't know about tomorrow;
I just live from day to day.
I don't borrow from its sunshine
For its skies may turn to grey.

I don't worry o'er the future,
For I know what Jesus said.
And today I'll walk beside Him,
For He knows what is ahead.

Many things about tomorrow
I don't seem to understand
But I know who holds tomorrow
And I know who holds my hand.


I don't know about tomorrow;
It may bring me poverty.
But the one who feeds the sparrow,
Is the one who stands by me.

And the path that is my portion
May be through the flame or flood;
But His presence goes before me
And I'm covered with His blood.

Many things about tomorrow
I don't seem to understand
But I know who holds tomorrow
And I know who holds my hand.

Last week was really wonderful.
- Thank God for the meeting with Dr EP. He's really a wonderful person. Gave us many insights and the next step for me. It's really a wonderful session.

- Thank God also for the KL trip.
For journey mercy, for the fun we had, and good time together there. For seeing us through despite the several fears along the way. Wonderful hostel, with the hidden passage to my 3rd floor room, and first time brick game pen2 defeated me....
For the first backpacking and budget trip.
For the first casino comedy....pen2 was caught for under age entry to the casino, made her very very happy.
Meeting Joanna and learnt many things from her life experience too
Eating To Fu Fa....first time after many years ..... found out we have same taste there
For the gift trip to Petronas skybridge (despite no more tickets)
And the KL Tower deadly kiss photo :D (the tribute goes to pen2x)

Lastly, the strength that i could finish FFCC training and this morning session, despite doing it alone. Yet we know that we never alone

Not by might, nor by power, but by the Spirit of the LORD. ~ Zech 4 : 6 ~

I thank God who brings me down on my knees. Again I realized the wonderful and liberating truth of the above verse. In the context of the whole Bible, the power, and might of the Spirit is far exceed any powers. Beyond our human's capabilities. He gives new birth, He regenerates new life, He strengthens the weary, He gives grace to the humble, He entrusted the treasures to the undeserved, He made them worthy, He sanctifies them, and He is my confidence.

No one worthy, no one good, no one has knowledge, no one wise. But the Spirit of the LORD, chooses, enables, and give gifts generously. With His power, wisdom, and knowledge....i go forth.

In my helpless & uncertain state, the whole Hebrews 11 account came to me. How did these people come to that point? How about others whom I heard of or know but the names not mentioned there? How did these people come to that point? Men & women like Amy Charmichael, Adoniram Judson, George Muller, Loren Cunningham, Corrie Ten Boom, and still many others of their contempories whom i heard their testimonies and sharing. How did these people come about?

Then i realize, they have had conqueor their fear. The valid, objective, and easonable fear. David faced Goliath in the name of the Lord, Hezekiah faced the Assyrian's armies, Abram faced the 5 kings with only 300 men, Deborah to lead against Sisera's chariots and the kings of the past, when they faced vast armies.....did they fear and tremble at the sight?

Their past experience was not discounted. Surely they must have experienced God's faithfulness that they could put their faith in front of face of fear. They must have witness that the Lord is faithful and able, that they could trust Him in the now and present. Oh that hidden and quiet experiences (some were recorded for us like David & Abram).

With that in mind, i pray that i face the present bravely. Every trainings is useful for the building up of faith. When i take faith seriously, that all matters trusted into the name of the Lord. And witnessing His deliverance and faithfulness to His own promises, then faith grows and develops. That when the time comes to face the multitudes and giants, i will not falter and fall. O Lord, what a necessary testing that I must go through.

And the more beautiful is Hebrews 12:2, that Jesus as the author and perfecter of our faith. He will bring into completion what He's established & started. That ultimately, God's sovereignty rules all lives, including my life & ur life & everyone's life, to bring into completion His ultimate purpose. So certainly, He will bring into pass. That in the light of His sovereign rule & plan, I could see my life serve that purpose. No matter how small or insignificant. Perhaps it's unseen and smaller than the tiniest dot. But it's it's purpose and meaning there. That it could serve as another dot in great cloud of witnesses. For my children's children. For future generations. Of God's faithfulness and His providence of everyone who trusts in Him. O what an amazing beyond words privilege. That our small and tiny life, could take part in His great and grand and gigantic and wonderful plan.

And it just transend all our weaknesses even mistakes we ever make/made. For not a single man/woman mentioned in Hebrews 11 or histories that are perfect and without a single mistakes. No, their life is full of mistakes, faults, and brokeness. None without great err or sorrowful testimonies. Even the greatest ones like Abraham, David, Samuel, Hezekiah, Josiah, Peter, John, Paul....and i believe Hudson Taylor, David Livingstone, William Carrey, Billy Graham, Bill Sunday, has commited mistakes which they would wished never to repeat. And yet, what a great comfort that Sovereign Lord uses them all. Indeed no matter how err or great our mistakes might be, He is able to overule those grief errors He's sovereign to see that His purpose is accomplished in us. O praise Him who can do greater than what we can think or imagine. Unto Him the immortal God be all glory, honor, and praise, forever and ever.

Today i decided to take a rest

Simply just to rest, and enjoy the moments of not doing anything ...  (though i'll soon start working on something again after this :p).

Only then when i dropped everything, I could truly enjoy the rest

A long afternoon nap....haven't had this kind long nap for long. Then cleaning my stuff........plenty of papers and books, that 1 hour i haven't had finished....hahaha.......still heaps of books and papers in my room i haven't touched. Did few laps of swimming....after 2 weeks haven't had chance to exercise my body. And reading comics too....haven't had chance for probably 1 month.

Simply glad for today that I could pause a while. Before going on to another cycle of 'dicsiplined' life. This week the 'real' life will begin, with hopefully the workload & more schoolload...

Glad for the fact that relationship with pen2x runs well (No quarrel for the past 1 month hehe..). Thankful for her understanding of my schedule and concerns. A lot of adjustments. Hope things to settle down soon.....my schedule to be more certain and fix soon, and she'll get some routine life also.

Yet at moments, perhaps next one month, there would be still many adjustments.....as the full load hasn't really show it's face. So it's a good pause Really treasure it.